I have never had a doubt about my masculinity. Never. Marine. Dad to two successful and independent daughters, each married.
Before I depart for the beach 🏖️ daily for my daily dose of Vitamin D and the marvelous eye candy from my equatorial living hangout in northeast Brasil, I recite my departure reminder....testicles, spectacles, wallet and keys. It all still works in my 82nd year! Oh yeah, and make sure you turned off the coffee maker.😎🥥🌴🌊🌞🏖️
Brilliant! I raised my sons like this and totally believe in it. Unfortunately, the two men I married were toxic. My sons' father abused them and belittled them but it's because his father did that to him. My first husband, who physically abused me, his father came home from the 2nd world war (this was in Yugoslavia) a changed man, a drunk with demons who horribly abused his wife and my ex. One time he came at my ex with an ax and he has a scar down his leg from it.
I left those men and trained in martial arts and full contact boxing and kickboxing. I even started the first (and only boxing club for girls in Luxor, Egypt.
I love my sons and I couldn't bear the hurt they felt from their dad and I didn't want history to repeat itself so I did everything I could to break that cycle that is passed down from generation to generation and thank God they are wonderful young men. My daughter, too. I raised them in martial arts. Every child should train in martial arts in school. It should be a vital part of the curriculum.
I support masculine, strong, chivalrous men who know the meaning of honesty, who stand by their word (very rare these days). Boys and girls are not the same and boys shouldn't be expected to behave like girls in school. I always say, who is the most idyllic character of a boy in literature and it's Tom Sawyer. He couldn't sit still in school and he was always getting into mischief. He's the boy these days that they would put on Ritalin and he would end up in juvenile hall. We have to let boys be boys and celebrate who they are.
Thanks Jen! What a message that all of us needed to hear. I was floored when they said to raise boys who are chivalrous and girls who are fearless. While our adult son and daughter have many qualities, we saw these specific ones for each as our ‘job one’! If that is their core quality, the rest will come.
I think the better strategy is to raise boys that are also fearless, as that will be needed to survive 50 years of man-hating feminism that continues today. As a doctor, I take it you know about the far-higher rates of male suicide and shorter life expectancy - and the fact that there is still no office of men's health to address that.
If your son is falsely accused of rape, you will both learn that being chivalrous didn't get him anywhere. The research has found that 40-60% of rape accusations are false.
Such a beautiful bookend to your women rock series! I am right now Heli skiing and so appreciate a male sized hand extended to help me up from deep snow. And the smiling face at the end of the arm is not always my husband’s! Men rock too 😊.
Though I’m completely agreeing with the message of the ad I’m not with the message that the ad Gillette made was telling men they are the problem. It was telling them that letting toxic masculinity go on unnoticed and unchallenged is bad and that there’s an alternative to toxicity. Which is pretty much the same as the xx xy ad.
The idea that Feminists think men are inherently toxic is for the most part an excuse for diismissing and bashing Feminism. While there are women who think that way, it isn't inherently in the feminist message.
"Masculinity" is not the same as being male, but rather is a set of male-coded behaviors and qualities. So the idea was not that men are inherently toxic. It's not even that masculinity is in itself toxic.
"Toxic masculinity" is a PARTICULAR KIND of masculinity. Toxic masculinity seeks to dominate others (especially women) and thus to abuse power, is overly aggressive, intimidating, and physically violent, views women as objects, and is lacking in empathy, nurture and emotional self-awareness.
Toxic masculinity has been around for a long time, and has done tremendous damage to women and society in general -- but clearly, the masculine qualities you wish to inculcate in men are not toxic. The way boys (and therefore, men) behave is very much shaped by parenting and other environmental factors.
It is true that the bar as to what is considered acceptable behavior toward woman has been raised. That would not exclude masculinity, or men, in general (vive la difference)!
Thank you, but I don't think the correct goal is to have "chivalrous sons". I think the goal is to strengthen men to withstand the culture that repeatedly tells men and boys that they are worthless and dangerous. The Democrats created the Office of Women's Health, which has become ten such offices, and there is still nothing for men's health - despite the 4 times greater numbers of male suicides, and the shorter male life expectancy. The Democrats state on their web site that they serve women, but not men.
Because it embodied the "misogynist" message that women were fundamentally different from men and needed their care and protection, chivalry was redefined as something oppressive, insulting, and undesirable. Supposedly we have left chivalry in the icky past, but instead it has been replaced by the State and the Market. Whee! How's that workin' out? Making chivalry a social virtue again (and safe to teach the young men to practice!) cannot occur without substantial changes to damn near everything. Chivalry's loss (and the rise of its replacements) is one of the reasons that men (and women!) feel alienated, hollow and ungrounded.
Mom of three sons here. This ad brought tears to my eyes. Thank you!🥹
I have no sons (or daughters), and it still brought tears to my eyes.
Good stuff, Jenn.
I have never had a doubt about my masculinity. Never. Marine. Dad to two successful and independent daughters, each married.
Before I depart for the beach 🏖️ daily for my daily dose of Vitamin D and the marvelous eye candy from my equatorial living hangout in northeast Brasil, I recite my departure reminder....testicles, spectacles, wallet and keys. It all still works in my 82nd year! Oh yeah, and make sure you turned off the coffee maker.😎🥥🌴🌊🌞🏖️
Wonderful ad. I got a bit teary too.
Love this!!!
Especially insightful: "We need to stop telling boys that they are toxic. We need to stop tearing them down to raise women up."
Mom of 2 sons here. This is beautiful and I love it.
I want to see that ALL DAY LONG in every medium. LOVE IT!
Brilliant! I raised my sons like this and totally believe in it. Unfortunately, the two men I married were toxic. My sons' father abused them and belittled them but it's because his father did that to him. My first husband, who physically abused me, his father came home from the 2nd world war (this was in Yugoslavia) a changed man, a drunk with demons who horribly abused his wife and my ex. One time he came at my ex with an ax and he has a scar down his leg from it.
I left those men and trained in martial arts and full contact boxing and kickboxing. I even started the first (and only boxing club for girls in Luxor, Egypt.
I love my sons and I couldn't bear the hurt they felt from their dad and I didn't want history to repeat itself so I did everything I could to break that cycle that is passed down from generation to generation and thank God they are wonderful young men. My daughter, too. I raised them in martial arts. Every child should train in martial arts in school. It should be a vital part of the curriculum.
I support masculine, strong, chivalrous men who know the meaning of honesty, who stand by their word (very rare these days). Boys and girls are not the same and boys shouldn't be expected to behave like girls in school. I always say, who is the most idyllic character of a boy in literature and it's Tom Sawyer. He couldn't sit still in school and he was always getting into mischief. He's the boy these days that they would put on Ritalin and he would end up in juvenile hall. We have to let boys be boys and celebrate who they are.
Thanks Jen! What a message that all of us needed to hear. I was floored when they said to raise boys who are chivalrous and girls who are fearless. While our adult son and daughter have many qualities, we saw these specific ones for each as our ‘job one’! If that is their core quality, the rest will come.
I think the better strategy is to raise boys that are also fearless, as that will be needed to survive 50 years of man-hating feminism that continues today. As a doctor, I take it you know about the far-higher rates of male suicide and shorter life expectancy - and the fact that there is still no office of men's health to address that.
If your son is falsely accused of rape, you will both learn that being chivalrous didn't get him anywhere. The research has found that 40-60% of rape accusations are false.
I love this post. Thank you. Masculinity isn't toxic.
Such a beautiful bookend to your women rock series! I am right now Heli skiing and so appreciate a male sized hand extended to help me up from deep snow. And the smiling face at the end of the arm is not always my husband’s! Men rock too 😊.
I love these ads.
Love love love them .
Though I’m completely agreeing with the message of the ad I’m not with the message that the ad Gillette made was telling men they are the problem. It was telling them that letting toxic masculinity go on unnoticed and unchallenged is bad and that there’s an alternative to toxicity. Which is pretty much the same as the xx xy ad.
The idea that Feminists think men are inherently toxic is for the most part an excuse for diismissing and bashing Feminism. While there are women who think that way, it isn't inherently in the feminist message.
"Masculinity" is not the same as being male, but rather is a set of male-coded behaviors and qualities. So the idea was not that men are inherently toxic. It's not even that masculinity is in itself toxic.
"Toxic masculinity" is a PARTICULAR KIND of masculinity. Toxic masculinity seeks to dominate others (especially women) and thus to abuse power, is overly aggressive, intimidating, and physically violent, views women as objects, and is lacking in empathy, nurture and emotional self-awareness.
Toxic masculinity has been around for a long time, and has done tremendous damage to women and society in general -- but clearly, the masculine qualities you wish to inculcate in men are not toxic. The way boys (and therefore, men) behave is very much shaped by parenting and other environmental factors.
It is true that the bar as to what is considered acceptable behavior toward woman has been raised. That would not exclude masculinity, or men, in general (vive la difference)!
Bless you Jennifer.
Thank you, but I don't think the correct goal is to have "chivalrous sons". I think the goal is to strengthen men to withstand the culture that repeatedly tells men and boys that they are worthless and dangerous. The Democrats created the Office of Women's Health, which has become ten such offices, and there is still nothing for men's health - despite the 4 times greater numbers of male suicides, and the shorter male life expectancy. The Democrats state on their web site that they serve women, but not men.
Because it embodied the "misogynist" message that women were fundamentally different from men and needed their care and protection, chivalry was redefined as something oppressive, insulting, and undesirable. Supposedly we have left chivalry in the icky past, but instead it has been replaced by the State and the Market. Whee! How's that workin' out? Making chivalry a social virtue again (and safe to teach the young men to practice!) cannot occur without substantial changes to damn near everything. Chivalry's loss (and the rise of its replacements) is one of the reasons that men (and women!) feel alienated, hollow and ungrounded.
Just awesome, thank you! Father of 3 boys, Grandfather to 1 (so far), Uncle to 2 others. And this message is so needed - chivalrous men are needed.